Sadly a few weeks ago my son was faced with an adult he cares about insulting him for no good reason. As a mother I wish I would have been there to protect my son from the situation. Moms are not always there though, so I ask, please be mindful of insulting children. If we want them to respect us, we need to respect them!
My son was taking with his older sister to go fishing. He had never gone before. He really dislikes bugs and wanted nothing to do with the worms. He did catch a fish and when he reeled it in he had a moment of panic. He realized he was killing the fish, and the reality of the food chain was before him. He wasn’t happy about it. He was told by his care giver to take the fish off the hook but he couldn’t stand the slimy feel of the fish and was still trying to deal with the idea of the fishes death. His care taker called him a girl, said he fished worse than a girl. (This girl has by the way caught a bigger trout in her life than said care taker and said care taker knows it!) Over and over my son was picked on. I have to think it was done not to hurt him but sometimes people pick on others they love, as a way to show affection. It is not something my son likes in the least and he does take it personally. He is 7 and very caring and thoughtful. He didn’t say anything mean back, but was clearly hurt. We have tried to help our son see what might have been the true intentions behind the words spoken to him and I think he understands.
As parents we want the best for our children. There are so many different paths we can take in how we try and get there. My husband and I try to practice peaceful parenting. It is more than just not spanking and yelling. It is also respecting boundaries and how the child feels. Our son doesn’t like bugs. So we try not to push the issue. We do though try and point out bugs he doesn’t seem to mind, like butterflies and lady bugs.
Golden Tortoise Beetle
When I saw an image of a golden tortoise beetle I knew I had to show my son. It is just so very interesting. Apparently they are in the north east of America and like sweet potato plants and plants like morning glories! While I grew up in New England and my parents had gardens with those plants, I never got to see one. Maybe someday!
Hopefully my son will think this guy is interesting enough to think twice about his dislike of most bugs!
Go Gently
One doesn’t have to push a child to help them improve. Go gently and don’t assume you have to address everything head on. Remember the spirit of a child can be damaged by the best of intentions and it is easier to peacefully raise a child than heal a broken adult.
