Not Perfect.

Middle of one of our days and as you can see my toddler is still in her PJs! I am not perfect!

The adventures here have vast, from frightening to very funny. From amazing rainbows and science to real life changing drama. As a mother I have never felt perfect, I have had my moments of doubt and I have had moments of pure bliss knowing my best was in fact good enough. Sometimes though, maybe more than I like to admit these days I simply fail. I have friends who remind me they look up to me and it brings tears to my eyes, do they know I feel the same way about them? I have huge flaws, this I promise. While I thrive in some areas, not so much in others, I am always questioning and try never to be closed minded to the idea that I could be wrong and certainly have been! From classical education to unschooling to waldorf my family has walked a very interesting path and found value in it all. Not walking any one of them perfectly mind you!

It took me a while to be ok with not perfect. I wanted at first a fail safe system the public school system seemed to program me with thinking existed. I thought if I could do this, this and this, then surely we would not fail. Only if we missed part of this or this I felt like we failed aready. I finally came to see that there is nothing magical about any one system and that was one of the very reasons why we homeschool, so we can find the parts that work for our children. I have seem others going through this, worried about perfection, wanting a hand rail to guide them to brilliant happy children only to see that no system is perfect and it can hurt the spirit when this happens. It can take a while to trust ones self rather than a system that doesn’t work for everyone anyway and it not natural to learning. It is like trying to learn about how tree bark feels but only being able to touch a smooth page in a book. Sure it is all wood, but no book can really do “living” in the world justice I think.

If your like me, and not perfect, that is Ok! Infact you are perfectly not perfect and that is natural. Our ideas of perfect are the issue and we need to let them go. A tree is perfect, perfectly dirty and living with wildlife! 🙂

A blog I came across thanks to: myeverydaymagic might help you as a parent and spouse feel a bit better about not being perfect.
http://www.projecthappilyeverafter.com/2010/09/9-ways-i%E2%80%99m-a-normal-mom-and-wife/

Confessions from others who might be like you, who admit to wearing cloths till they are really dirty, to not eve folding laundry, to fearing the worst things for no good reason, to having no patience with their kids, to hiring a maid!

And so here is my confession for the day.
I only put a bra on when I am going out or someone is coming over. Heck, sometimes PJs are the theme of my week if I can get away with it. If I take a while when your ringing my bell then chances are I have to put something on so you do not see way too much skin! LOL I like to be comfy. Oh and if it takes me a bit to get to the door, I might be making sure my toddler did not leave any gifts in the bathroom in her potty! Ewww. LOL